Within the deadly duo of Stefan and Damon Salvatore, it was clear that Stefan was meant to be the good brother on The Vampire Diaries. However, Stefan wasn't always the good guy that he claimed to be, and sometimes he was downright shameless when it came to doing genuinely awful and unforgivable things.
Stefan was an absolute expert at rationalizing his bad behavior and telling himself and other people that he was doing something bad in service of something good. And because he was so good at excusing his own awful decisions, he could do some legitimately terrible things without even a hint of shame or remorse. In fact, he typically felt little regret at his decisions because he was so skilled at telling himself there were no other options. So these are the 10 most shameless things that Stefan Salvatore ever did.
Letting Damon Run Wild
So Stefan shouldn't be held completely responsible for the behavior of his brother, because Damon makes his own choices and ultimately will do what he wants, regardless of what anyone in the world thinks.
However, in many instances of Damon's malfeasance, Stefan had the opportunity to do something to stop him but chose not to. And frankly, while Stefan isn't responsible for Damon, it's undeniably true that a lot of the horrible things Damon did were a part of his endless issues with his baby bro, and instead of walking away from the situation Stefan continued to engage with Damon.
Dying For Damon
In theory, dying for your brother is a good thing, so Stefan shouldn't really be ashamed of that. And it's clear that Stefan feels ultimately responsible for Damon even being a vampire in the first place, so giving him his life back was a hugely meaningful event in both of their lives.
However, Damon has done enough awful things that it seems fair to say he doesn't really deserve a second shot at life, and more importantly, Stefan was kind of overlooking everything else in his life in service of Damon. Stefan wanted to be epic, but he didn't ask for the opinions or feelings of anyone around him when he decided to do that.
Dragging Elena Into Vampire Drama
It comes as no surprise that Stefan was totally thrown for a loop when he saw Elena Gilbert for the first time. That was a totally normal reaction.
However, that didn't mean that Stefan needed to return to Mystic Falls and interfere in Elena's life. He could have just as easily investigated from afar and not gotten romantically involved with Elena, but it was especially inconsiderate of him to start dating her without letting her know that he and his brother were vampires, and that she bore a freakishly striking resemblance to the vampire that made them both.
Killing Vicki Donovan
When Vicki Donovan was initially turned into a vampire, Stefan made quite the to do about trying to help her manage the situation and figure out how everything worked.
But Stefan had a bad habit of projecting his own vampire issues on to others, so he was incredibly restrictive with Vicki when he really didn't need to be.
And of course, as soon as Vicki posed any kind of threat to Elena, he didn't hesitate to kill her, even though he really didn't have to. Which was an unfortunately typical Stefan move, to essentially be the good guy until it becomes inconvenient.
Blood Binging With Klaus
Stefan did a lot of things that were against his own morals for the sake of Damon, but there are few things worse than the summer of insanity that Stefan spent with Klaus while they were searching for werewolves.
Stefan obviously justified his decision because it was the only way that he could save Damon from a deadly werewolf bite, but clearly at some point Stefan started really enjoying his bloody rampage. He never fully handed himself over to Klaus, but he definitely used his captivity with Klaus as an excuse to let his ripper side get the satisfaction it always craved.
Stay On The Wagon... Even When He Shouldn't
Stefan Salvatore is not your average vampire when it comes to surviving on human blood. While most vamps can drink bagged blood or just take some stealthy sips from a living person before healing them and compelling them to forget it, Stefan has a sip of human blood and then wants to gorge himself on as much human blood as he can find.
So he typically sticks to animal blood when he can, even though it keeps him weaker and sicker than any normal vampire. His decision is understandable in most cases, but often times when he really needed the extra strength he wouldn't drink human blood, even if it put the people around him in danger.
Allow Damon To Abuse Caroline
One of Stefan's grossest decisions throughout the entire series came pretty early on in the show, and that was his choice to allow Damon to use and abuse Caroline.
As we just mentioned, Stefan often times wouldn't drink human blood even when he should have, and this is one of the clearest instances of that.
He didn't want to go off the wagon in order to put Damon in his place, and when Stefan was faced with the choice of protecting Elena, staying a teetotaler, or helping Caroline, he was more than willing to let his future wife be the sacrificial lamb on Damon's altar.
Forcing Damon To Become A Vampire
It seems like Katherine always planned on keeping Stefan and Damon around since she was constantly dosing them with vampire blood, but since Damon Salvatore is a confirmed stage 5 clinger he really didn't care about staying alive once he believed that Katherine had been killed.
Stefan, on the other hand, was all about the vampire life as soon as he turned. And since he couldn't stand the thought of losing Damon, he pressured Damon into becoming a vampire even though Damon really didn't want to, which was a decision that they both would ultimately regret for years to come.
Lying To Elena
Ostensibly Stefan probably reasoned with himself that he lied to Elena for her own good, but that rationalization allowed him to shamelessly mislead and manipulate the woman he loved for pretty much their entire relationship.
Their initial romance was based on lies, and Stefan would typically only reveal the truth to Elena once he couldn't hide it from her anymore. And his protective impulses may have been kind, but the way that he went about protecting Elena really forced her into the role of damsel in distress, even if that was a role Elena never wanted to play.
Abandoning Caroline
So Stefan killed himself because he was feeling epic, and for whatever reason he decided that this was a choice that he didn't really need to discuss with his wife. Hell, he didn't even think to inform her of it.
Stefan and his hero hair were always the type to make grand gestures for the people that he loved, but he never seemed to stop and think of how those gestures might affect the other people he loved. He shamelessly abandoned Caroline because it was in service of Damon's greater good, but that's not really something a good partner or good person would do.