Every Family Guy Christmas episode has something unique to offer, though Seth Macfarlane's animated comedy has misses as well as hits among the festive specials of its 25-year run. There have been 11 Christmas episodes of Family Guy so far, with the best of them also being examples of the show at its strongest. Installments like season 16’s “Don’t Be A Dickens At Christmas” and season 9’s “Road To The North Pole” are Family Guy doing what it does best, and even the worst of the festive outings are still far from the weakest episodes of the show overall.
It’s Family Guy has never really had a bad Christmas special. However, there is a definite gap between the best and the worst Family Guy Christmas episodes. When comparing every Family Guy Christmas episode, it’s a case of how well the plot and humor manage to harness the festive season, with the top of the pile being some of the most memorable outings in the show’s history, and the bottom being missed opportunities for which the holiday season had little bearing on the plot.
11 Christmas Guy
Family Guy Season 12, Episode 8 (2013)
Season 12’s “Christmas Guy” is the worst Family Guy Christmas episode, though it does have one important redeeming aspect. “Christmas Guy” is the episode that reversed the death of Brian Griffin, which occurred 3 episodes earlier in season 12, episode 6, “Life of Brian”. Brian was replaced by Vinny (Tony Sirico), and the producers insisted that the move was permanent.
Whether it was a publicity stunt or not, viewers weren’t happy with Vinny as a permanent Family Guy character. Neither was Stewie Griffin, so he uses his time machine to save Brian and bring him back. While there’s a seasonal sub-plot involving Peter and his father-in-law, Carl Pewterschmidt, “Christmas Guy” feels much less like a Christmas episode than the title suggests. The best Family Guy Christmas episodes make hilarious use of the holiday, which “Christmas Guy” simply doesn't.
10 Christmas Crime
Family Guy Season 20, Episode 10 (2021)
Season 10’s “Christmas Crime” stands out as something of a missed opportunity, as it could have been a much better Family Guy Christmas episode than it ended up. The season 20 installment sees Brian becoming Quahog’s public enemy #1 after he accidentally destroys Mayor Wild West’s nativity scene. Knowing that Brian is an outspoken atheist and Christmas skeptic, the town refuses to believe he didn’t wreck the display deliberately, and he ends up spending Christmas day alone in jail.
Given that Brian is such an often-nihilistic character and laughs at those who hold faith in more-or-less anything, “Christmas Crime” could have been an interesting opportunity to explore some deeper themes. Family Guy has always done this surprisingly well, and so “Christmas Crime” could have been one of the more mature episodes of the show and, in the process, one of the best Christmas episodes. This sadly wasn’t the case though, and it led to “Christmas Crime” becoming an incredibly forgettable Christmas episode of Family Guy.
9 The 2,000-Year-Old Virgin
Family Guy Season 13, Episode 6 (2014)
While it’s not one of the best Christmas outings for the show, season 13’s “The 2000 Year-Old Virgin” is one of the most controversial Family Guy episodes. It’s also the episode that introduced viewers to Peter’s now-viral obsession with “Surfin’ Bird” by the Trashmen. While this makes “The 2000-Year-Old Virgin” memorable, it suffers from the same setback as “Christmas Crime” and “Christmas Guy” when it comes to Family Guy Christmas episodes - it’s not that Christmassy.
The plot of “The 2000-Year-Old Virgin” sees Peter meet the adult Jesus in a record store, and is shocked to learn that Jesus is still a virgin. Things take a turn for the worse when Jesus reveals he wants to learn his virginity to Lois. However, it turns out Jesus is running a scam, and has used the same lie to sleep with the wives of plenty of men. This, understandably, made the episode incredibly controversial. When it comes to utilizing the festive holiday in the plot, Peter meeting Jesus on a pre-Christmas shopping trip is pretty much the only nod to the season the episode makes.
8 The First No L
Family Guy Season 19, Episode 9 (2020)
“The First No L” from Family Guy season 19 is a great Lois Griffin episode, and a solid installment for the show overall, though it’s far from the best of the Griffin family’s Christmas adventures. The season 19 Family Guy Christmas episode sees Lois finally having enough of being underappreciated, so she decides to spend Christmas Day in Mexico. At least, that’s what she tells the rest of the household.
In reality, Lois simply books into a motel and watches the family through binoculars. Much to her shock, Peter, Meg, Chris, Stewie, and Brian manage to get Christmas ready without any major snags. She realizes that the reason she puts so much effort into Christmas isn’t because she has to, but because she wants to. It’s a hilarious story since it shows Lois can be just as unhinged as Peter when she wants to, but isn’t anywhere near as strong as the best Christmas episodes of Family Guy.
7 The Return Of The King (Of Queens)
Family Guy Season 22, Episode 9 (2023)
Season 22’s “The Return Of The King (Of Queens)” is the most recent Family Guy Christmas episode. It has plenty of funny moments, and inarguably has the strangest plot of any seasonal Family Guy outing so far. In the episode, Lois sells the TV, and so Peter is forced to find other ways to entertain himself. His boredom is quickly lifted when Kevin James (voiced by Josh Robert Thompson) arrives at the Griffin home.
It turns out that Peter Griffin is solely responsible for Kevin James’ success, since he’s more-or-less the only person watching the actor’s various shows and, most importantly, Christmas specials. Peter has to teach Kevin James how to navigate life outside of sitcoms, but there’s a catch - the more James learns about living in reality, the more of his body mysteriously vanishes. It’s bizarre as far as the Christmas episodes of Family Guy go, though it works incredibly well as a satire of the formulaic holiday specials many live-action sitcoms have released.
6 How The Griffin Stole Christmas
Family Guy Season 15, Episode 9 (2016)
Season 15’s “How The Griffin Stole Christmas” mimics the plot of A Nightmare Before Christmas in many ways. Essentially, Peter decides he’d like to try his hand at being Santa Claus after getting a taste of power while working as a mall Satna - and it backfires as quickly and spectacularly as fans expected. What’s more, the real Santa shows up to reprimand Peter, which he does by threatening to kill him.
It’s a funny episode as far as Family Guy goes, but isn’t as memorable as many of the better Christmas installments of the show (although is far better than the worst). The side-plot is entertaining too, as Brian and Stewie find themselves roped into boring office jobs after gate-crashing work Christmas parties. “How The Griffin Stole Christmas” has a lot going for it, and in many ways marks the halfway point between the best Family Guy Christmas episodes and those that are sub-par.
5 Jesus, Mary And Joseph!
Family Guy Season 11, Episode 8 (2012)
Season 11’s “Jesus, Mary And Joseph!” is one of the best Christmas episodes of Seth Macfarlane’s animated sitcom, and the show doing something it does best - retelling a well-known story using Family Guy characters. In this case, Peter tells the story of the birth of Jesus, with himself as Joseph and Lois as the Virgin Mary. It’s exactly as hilarious as fans would expect, with much of the humor in the same lane as the “Blue Harvest” parody trilogy.
“Jesus, Mary And Joseph!” also deserves some recognition for taking time to discuss the deeper meaning behind the Nativity story and why it’s an important foundation for ideas like family, togetherness, and gratitude that form the emotional core of Christmas as a holiday. It’s also much more respectful than how the show used Jesus in “The 2,000-Year-Old Virgin”. Not every joke in the season 11 Family Guy Christmas episode hits the mark, but it’s a hilarious and solid seasonal installment nonetheless.
4 Christmas Is Coming
Family Guy Season 18, Episode 9 (2019)
Season 18’s “Christmas Is Coming” is one of the more risqué Family Guy Christmas episodes, and it’s this that makes it so hilarious in many ways. What’s more, it’s also a Stewie and Meg-centric story, which is an underutilized yet fan-favorite pairing. The plot of “Christmas Is Coming” revolves around Meg trying to console a traumatized Stewie after he realizes sitting on Santa’s knee brings her sexual gratification.
The episode also takes a turn for the bizarre when it turns out the mall Santa the pair visited is actually the real Santa Claus. It’s one of the best Family Guy Christmas episodes because it’s laced with the incredibly edgy humor the show has become known for. It’s filled with many moments that walk the line between hilarious and uncomfortable, which make it impossible to forget, and it also has some of the best Stewie and Meg moments in the show so far, too.
3 Don’t Be A Dickens At Christmas
Family Guy Season 16, Episode 9 (2017)
When it comes to the absolute best Family Guy Christmas episodes, season 16’s “Don’t Be A Dickens At Christmas” is a strong contender for first place. The only reason it isn’t because those that beat it are so exemplary. However, as a Family Guy Christmas installment, “Don’t Be A Dickens At Christmas” is more-or-less flawless. The episode is a parody of Charles Dicken’s A Christmas Carol, though instead of Ebenezer Scrooge being forced to reconcile with his past, present, and future, it’s Peter Griffin.
Every scene as Peter is guided through his history, present, and what awaits him if he doesn’t change his ways is priceless. Of particular note is that he’s taken through his spiritual experience by the ghost of Patrick Swayze (played by Don Swayze). There’s no justification or rationale for this choice, and it perfectly fits the absurdism that makes every great Family Guy episode so memorable.
2 A Very Special Family Guy Freakin’ Christmas
Family Guy Season 3, Episode 16 (2001)
Family Guy has been on the air for over two decades, and its first Christmas episode - released all the way back in 2001 when season 3 arrived - remains one of the best. “A Very Special Family Guy Freakin’ Christmas” has a very simple plot, and it works incredibly well. It’s a comedy of errors that sees Lois beset by setback after setback on her quest to get Stewie to play the part of Baby Jesus in the town nativity.
By the end of “A Very Special Family Guy Freakin’ Christmas”, Lois becomes so overcome with rage that she climbs the Quahog Christmas tree and has to be taken out with a tranquilizer. It’s filled with an incredible amount of classic Family Guy moments and epitomizes everything that made earlier seasons of the show so great. It also proves that, as fun as the bizarre and absurd modern episodes are, Family Guy never needed to be surreal or overly-edgy to be one of the funniest shows on TV.
